God is So Good

Wow. Lots has happened this past month. Sort of. It's been a wild roller coaster of very "up" days and rather boring days. I filled out many more job applications which went unanswered or were denied. I could not lose hope. I had to trust in God's plan. For He does have a plan for me, for you, for everyone. "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD. "Plans to prosper you, not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."

I can skip over the monotony of applying for jobs, etc....but I do have to announce that I am officially an employed Registered Nurse now. God is SO GOOD. So faithful. He gave me the desires of my heart.

"Delight yourself in the LORD and He will give you the desires of your heart." -Psalm 37:4

Well, He gave me the desires of my fragile heart. I was disciplined, trusting in God's plan, living on hope. I persevered. I prayed, yearned for direction. God miraculously closed one door and opened another on the SAME DAY. He loves us with an everlasting love. He has drawn us with unfailing kindness.

"Go gently through this day, keeping your eyes on Me," He says. "I will open up the way for you as you take steps of trust along your path. If you come across an obstacle, turn to Me, focus on Me who is your shepherd and leads you in the way everlasting. My presence enables you to face each day with confidence."

I have reason to sing. God. Is. INCREDIBLE. I do not even know how to express it. Nothing will EVER do justice to His goodness, sweetness, faithfulness! His glory and face shines upon us. There is nothing more beautiful than learning about true surrender: what it entails, what it means, what it looks like. The actual act of surrender appears to be one of weakness; but in God's kingdom, it is the utmost for His highest. I attended a worship event tonight called Mudhouse. I surrender everything at the feet of Jesus....having fully understood what it means to revel in and understand my BROKENNESS, learning about the things that keep me from God. We learned, brokenness is NOT sin. SIN is what happens when brokenness is given to anyone else besides GOD. There was ample time to think about what keeps me personally from fully living in the presence of God. Believing that He meant to create everyone else in the world...except for me....or thinking that maybe He made a mistake or a glitch in me...this mask, so disguised, but which makes me so disgusting, useless, worthless, ugly, fat, undeserving of anything and everything...THAT is the cross I carry daily. And though I'm trying hard as I might to turn it over and use it for God's glory, I can't help wondering how I can use this to glorify God when it keeps me from Him at the same time. Of course it's possible....anything is possible in Christ.

I have spiritual weapons that DEMOLISH those strongholds in my life. They allow me to break free and depend COMPLETELY on Jesus. Truth, righteousness, the Gospel of peace, faith, salvation.....these weapons are all energized by prayer. I do not have to be a slave to appearances, to worth, to anything else BECAUSE OF JESUS. Everyone is a slave to something or someone, they could not possibly deny that truth. It's the master, however, who decides whether slavery results in life or death. Apart from God's awesome grace, we are slaves to sin. When sin is our master, we DIE. But when we become slaves of grace, God wins. We get life. Slavery only to God actually FREES us to fully be what we were created to be. God intended the law to help us see what sin really is. We know we have not fulfilled the law. We have broken it; we have sinned. Therefore, the law is good, necessary. It shows us that we CANNOT live in our own power! That only leads to death. But the law CAN lead to life through Jesus. He is the culmination and fulfillment of the law! He is the only one who can empower us to live through the Spirit. As long as we live in this broken, twisted, rebellious world, there will be sin. Be sure that it will come knocking on the door. But it does NOT HAVE AUTHORITY. Even though death can take the body, we gain life in Christ because of righteousness. Jesus was not overcome on the cross. He was the overcomer.